If you make your children the center of your world, they may grow up thinking they are the center of the universe!

   It is very difficult to dedicate your entire life to your kids and then expect they will grow up to be an adult who will give themselves selflessly to others. If we think people are becoming more and more self-centered we should stop and ask ourselves, "Who put them at the center?"  The little boy who got trophies for simply showing up and the princess girl who slept in her tiara every night, just might have a tough time being tossed together into a selfless marriage later on. The bottom line is that the greatest thing a couple can give their kids is a solid marriage. What every kid really wants are parents that have a strong marriage. If you really want to put your kids first do so by putting your marriage first. In the end your kids will thank you and so will the rest of the universe.

If you have to tell them you're Gregory Peck, you're not!

     Reputation is who folks think you are while character is who you are when no one else is around. There is nothing more frustrating than to see something in the display case window only to find out they don't have it in your size or color. When  people see your life are you more or less than what they see? 
     The story is told that actor Gregory Peck (kids ask your parents who this is) stood at the back of a line awaiting  a table at a fine Hollywood restaurant when some of the folks in line began to recognize him and wondered why he did not cut to the front and make his presence known to the hostess. Upon being questioned Peck simply responded, "If you have to tell them your Gregory Peck, you're not!" Friends, if you have to tell them your spiritual, you're not. Let's make sure we have more in the warehouse than in the showroom.

Please make sure to secure your own mask before assisting others.

     The flight attendant always tells you that in case of a drop in cabin pressure to calmly take the yellow  mask when it drops down in front of you and put your's on first before assisting others. Oh yeah, and breath normal! What makes sense in an emergency makes sense every day. There is nothing wrong with caring for others and we are taught at an early age to live a selfless life, but taking care of yourself is one of the most selfless things you can do. What good are you to those around you if you black out first?
     One of the greatest things a husband can do to care for his wife is to care for his own health while young so as to be around later to care for her. One of the most selfless things a retiree can do is save enough money for themselves so as to not be a burden financially on their kids later.  Put others first by not neglecting yourself.  Don't care for others to the point you have nothing left for them or you.  In the end everyone will have a better flight!

You're Either On the Way or In the Way

     You really cannot stand still in life. You are either moving forward or backward, but there is no standing still. You are either a missionary or a mission field. Each year Christians head to various locations across this globe to boldly live among indigenous people for seven days.  Patiently loving others, doing acts of kindness and using any and all opportunities to share Christ. 
     358 days a year we too often timidly live among our fellow indigenous neighbors, oblivious to daily opportunities to share our faith and too busy to really find time to be kind.  So what gives? Does seven days on mission to total strangers make up for 358 days of non-missional living among those that we know? The Great Commission is real. Jesus left heaven to come to earth and then changed the world by never venturing outside His own country. His life was mission; mission was His life. The Great Commission really is, "As you go therefore."  Go on that mission trip this year and then come home and remember your life is your mission. Are you on the way or in the way?

Your raise will become effective when you are!

People everywhere are wanting more and more for less and less. Whether at work, home, church or school;  folks want to give less, but receive more. It really is true that if you have a job that you would do for free and can get paid for it then you never really work a day in your life. I have a job like that. Not always easy. Never the same two days in a row. And I would not trade it for anything.  The best way to get a promotion is to promote yourself by becoming effective. When your life adds value to others you  marry success and significance into a career, call, mission and passion.  Don't give in to the entitlement mentality. Common sense and work ethic are so rare today that anyone with character, competence and chemistry can float to the top like cream. So start churning out the work!

Don't Shoot the Dog to Kill the Tick

Do you act or react? Neither is wrong, but over reacting is. Too many people lay back and do nothing about issues that they need to deal with, hoping that things will just work out on its own. How is that working for you?  Still others rush in over reacting in a panic and not taking the time to seek wise counsel or to reflect on similar situations from the past. Sort of their own version of a panic attack on the situation.Confrontation is the greatest thing that most folks will never do. The ticks of life must be dealt with, but make sure you take aim and focus your methods only to the extent that you have to in order to deal with the issue properly in love and truth and then leave the  poor dog alone.

Pay Now, Play Later

Maturity is the ability to postpone pleasure. Every infant wants to eat or be changed right this very minute and they will tell you so. There are two paths  people can take. They can either play now and pay later, or pay now and play later. Regardless of the choice, one thing is certain. Life will demand a payment. You can exercise today to extend your health tomorrow. You can save today to spend tomorrow. You can eat at home today rather than hit the drive through and thereby go out for steak down the road. Bottom line is there is no such thing as a “free lunch,”  life is not a gift—it is an investment. The sooner you  take control of your desires and submit them to life’s demands, the more successful you will become.  When we pay later, the price is even greater!

I'm Gonna . . . Never Did!

How many times did I hear my kids tell me they were gonna make their bed or pick up their room only to go into the room hours later and find a mess of good intentions (or not)? Better yet were the 10 minute monologues they gave me as to why they did not have time to do a five minute job! Cause and effect is a lost concept. We reap what we sow, don't sow or never get around to sowing for that matter.  So how are you doing? What were you gonna do that you simply take too much time explaining to yourself and others so as to not get it done? Gonna never did and never will. So, while you're sitting around convincing yourself you don't have time to do what you were gonna do, why not go ahead and check out the rest of the posts on this blog? I know ... you're gonna.

Don't put off until tomorrow what you can put off forever!

If setting boundaries in life creates margin and the greatest things in life happen in the margin of your life, then you don't have to keep carrying items 8, 9 and 10 on your 'To Do' list over to tomorrow! In fact, it just might be that some of those things that keep getting bumped don't need to happen at all or someone else might even do them. Life is about doing the best things not everything. When you get to the end, it really is about God and family and the truth is you are not as important as your constant flow of emails would have you believe. Ask if what you have planned for tomorrow is the next thing, a good thing or the best thing! Procrastination is bad, but setting genuine priorities is great.

If every room stinks, check YOUR shoes!

We have all been there whether you have a dog or not. You walk all around the house wondering why every room stinks only to look down, check your shoes and realize you are tracking "it"around. Yes you. You thought that in going to a new room you would find fresh air, but then you realize it is you dragging the stink around with you. If every job. Every relationship. Every group you seek to connect with "stinks", stop, look down and check your own shoes. It may well be that you are the most common denominator in all of your life situations.  Remember, wherever you go, there you are!

Dance in the Rain

Today my wife gave me a great card for our 32nd anniversary that reads, "Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass. It's about learning how to dance in the rain."  I teased her that she could have made a Facebook post that would read, "Happy 32nd anniversary SS! Thanks for 30 wonderful years."  Truth is that anyone  really honest will tell you that not everyday of every year in anyone's life is smooth sailing, married or not! You don't marry the right person, you seek to become the right person and when you do you are able to dance in the rain. I married perfection! Perfect for me.  Happy Anniversary KS!

Hey Grads, You Are Not Special! Not Yet Anyway!!

When we make our kids the center of our world we should not be surprised to discover they grow up thinking they are the center of the universe. This Boston high school commencement speaker tells it like it is and the fact that high school grads are not special. At least not yet! If you want to cheer uncommon common sense feel free to click here for this 12 minute commencement address to end all addresses. And hey grads, feel free to commence seeking to be somebody special.

Never Resign on a Monday

     I don't know what a Monday looks like for you, but for those who work in church it is often the day after the biggest sense of success or failure of their week. It is a day of fatigue and it is usually on the back of emotional drain good or bad. Sundays offer up both praise and criticism for what you have poured yourself into for the sake of others ... therefore never resign on a Monday or you will do so every week! 

     Now you may not work on a church staff, but make sure you never make your biggest life decisions on the back of a huge success, failure or in the midst of fatigue.  Many a church staff member has missed out on the excitement that is thirty years of experience in exchange for two year's experience fifteen times! So hang in there. Weather the storm. Enjoy both the good  days and the bad and never resign on a Monday!!

Push me down and shove me around

If I ran up to you and shoved you to the ground what would you think? What if I told you I saw you were in danger from a truck barreling down on you that you did not see? That might change your mind and you would actually be grateful!  Do you have true friends in your life that when they see situations barreling down on you spiritually, emotionally, relationally or vocationally that they jump into action even if you might misunderstand? I hope you do. A real friend will speak the truth in love to you and tell you what you need to hear and not just what you want to hear.

If You Live Long Enough, You Will Die of Something

The one thing we know everyone will do is die and yet we really hate to talk about it or prepare for it. It is great to eat right and live a healthy lifestyle, but in the end the end comes. Are you prepared? Do you have financial and logistical plans? Do family members know what they are and how to activate them? What about your spiritual situation? When you get to the end you will only worry about your relationship to God and family. How are you doing with those now? Now while you have the time. All of us are terminal, we just don't know how long we have. Make the most of it. Make it count. Invest now in what will matter later.

Not knowing Why does not mean there is no purpose

Like Job of old, we all want to know the why of what we are going through. The truth is that there is always a reason but we may not always know what it is. The lack of an awareness of purpose does not remove the fact there is purpose. Every parent has tired of the insesent "Why?" of a child only to answer simply, "Because." The answer does not satisfy the child, but parents know that often the child is incabable or unwilling to understand what is really in their best interest.  Next time you consider asking, "Why", simply ask yourself, "Why not?"

You Have to Give Up to Go Up!

Leaders really have fewer choices, not more. The wide way is not open to leaders as they have to do what others are not willing or able to do. To go up the ladder of leadership you will have to be willing to give up the things that others cannot or will not give up to lead.

Completely understanding a truth of God does not mean you completely understand God.

Job had friends, but while  they spoke truth, it was not truth for his situation. Beware  when you feel the need to apply a biblical truth to a life that it is being applied to the same situation as where you found the truth in scripture. It is called context. A truth taken out of context and applied out of context is not longer truth. Study to show yourself approved rightly dividing the word of truth. Then you wont be ashamed.

What are you becoming?

My son raised a great question when he asked himself, "Am I becoming the kind of man that the kind of woman I want to meet wants to meet?" The truth is you are becoming what you are and you must choose now to be the kind of person you want to become later. It is called discipline. Success comes daily, not in a day so you must decide now if you are willing to say yes and no to the best things to be the kind of person the kind of person you want in your life wants in their life.  The good news is you can change. The bad news is that most folks do not. Make sure you not only date the kind of folks that you want to marry one day, but that you are also the kind of person you would want to marry. Think about it.

If You Want to be Interesting, be Interested

Most of us try way too hard to be funny or entertaining. All you really need to do is simply be a great audience. Next time you want to impress someone and hope they find you interesting, simply ask them about themselves and then listen, really listen. In fact, ask another question to show you want to go further with your interest in them. You will be amazed how that when they walk away from you they talk about how interesting you were to talk with, and all because you simply cared enough to be interested in them!